Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors where we share 8 sentences of our writing, published or unpublished for your viewing pleasure and critique. Remember to click the button above to visit other weekend writing warriors. The following 8 comes from my latest work in progress. Vampire Layla is awake after sleeping 2,000 years and I’d love to hear your thoughts.
“Who are you?” Nubiti, the golden lady began to kick and scratch at Layla’s hands.
“Doo…not…fee-arrh…meee…” Her vocal cords stilted the strange words even to her ears, with a rasping halt that sounded too deep to be human.
When Nubiti screamed and kicked her in the face, the spiked heel of her sandal lodged in Layla’s eye.
“Nubiti…” The low rumble Layla emitted was meant to sooth but she could not temper the power behind it. Unable to find calming words, she shook her head as the woman’s eyes rolled. Nubiti was keening now, hysterical in fear.
Layla crawled over the woman, rubbing the dark, glittering stones on her garment, like stars in the night, which left most of her body bare. The golden lady looked into the eye she’d ruptured with her shoe, her own blue eyes widening as the fissure closed.
Self healing is awesome. Love the excerpt!
That’s the fun part about writing vampires, I love creating their powers. Thanks Heather. 🙂
Great descriptions!
Thanks E D 🙂
That would be a bit freaky!
It certainly is.:)
It’s very intriguing, but I’m a bit confused as to which one is asking “Who are you?” since both are in the line after. And the next line I’m assuming is Layla, but it might clarify it more by saying “Layla’s vocal cords….” I had to read it a couple times. Of course it could be because I’m just jumping in on a snippet, and it’s probably clearer in the full scene, so feel free to ignore me totally. 🙂 It certainly makes me want to keep reading see what happens next!
History Sleuth’s Milk Carton Murders
Good point historysleuth. The golden lady asked the first question. I will have to take another look at that. Thanks for your comments!
That would freak me out, too. Even with the self-healing, I bet that’s quite a face Layla has.
There’s something very chilling about Layla’s sorrow for the golden lady even though she is going to kill her.
Wow, I am still shaking after reading this snippet. Great 8.
Glad I shook you up, Chelle. 🙂
This was scary, I have no idea what just happen. I think I would freak out just like Nubiti.
Fortunately for Nubiti – her freak doesn’t last long. 🙂